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SH1/2W: An interview with UConn's professor of time travel

The man on the left is NOT Dr. Ronald Mallett

The man on the left is NOT Dr. Ronald Mallett.

Dr. Ron Mallett is a University of Connecticut physics professor best-known for his work on creating a time machine. Ron gives his thoughts below.

TheUConnBlog: Hello, professor. How are you?

Dr. Mallett: I will be doing great. Haha, little time traveler joke, there.

UB: Now, I know some people won't believe that you're actually a UConn professor, or a potential time traveler. Care to list your credentials?

DRM: Well, you can read all about me on the Internet [here, here, here or here].

Time travel is a legitimate dream of mine.

UB: Very interesting.

DRM: Absolutely. And now, my most difficult project, the reason they sometimes call me crazy, is finally complete! I've created ... A TIME MACHINE! [thunder sound effects]

UB: Where did the thunder and lightning come from?

DRM: I bring my own special effects wherever I go.

UB: Oh. So, are you like Doc from Back to the Future?

DRM: Not at all. I don't give a damn about Michael J. Fox.

UB: Word. [Scrambles to ask question] So, you invented a time machine. Does it work?

DRM: Absolutely.

UB: Fantastic. Have you tested it out so far?

DRM: Not a whole lot. I just started working with it yesterday. I went back to 2005, and I told myself I'd never finish this time machine. Totally blew his/my mind. I did feel like I was disappearing a little bit. No big deal.

UB: So why did you contact us this week?

DRM: Well, I know you guys aren't just a sports blog, you guys follow everything that goes on on campus. And I think this will bring great publicity to UConn.

UB: Oh, well that's pretty cool.

DRM: Nah, I'm just screwing with you. I did something I think you'll like.

UB: What's that?

DRM: Does the date March 30, 1987 ring a bell to you?

UB: Well, that was two months before I was born, but I'll take a shot in the dark: is it the Indiana-Syracuse NCAA championship game?

DRM: Correctamundo.

UB: Please don't say that.

DRM: Sure. Now, what do you remember about that game?

UB: Great game. Keith Smart of Indiana hit a jumper with three seconds left, and Indiana won the championship. Terrible loss for Syracuse. I can't even imagine being five seconds away from a championship and then blowing it. That was one of the great title games ever. They seem to show that highlight every year.

DRM: Sure, now they do.

UB: Huh?

DRM: Don't you get it? I went back in time and altered the events of that night. Don't ask me how. It takes a lot of complicated physics to explain.

UB: So this isn't how it actually happened?

DRM: Nope. Originally, #24 on Indiana travels with about eight seconds left and Syracuse hits some free throws to clinch the game. Syracuse won the 1987 championship, three more in the 1990's, and two more before Jim Boeheim retired in 2004 with 934 wins. And what UConn fans now remember as the Dream Season in 1990? Never happened. Syracuse steamrolled them in the Big East tournament championship game.

UB: All that from that one play?

DRM: Absolutely. Did you ever see The Butterfly Effect?

UB: No.

DRM: Neither did I. Actually, I did originally, but I went back and prevented myself. Saved me years of heartache.

UB: in reality, Syracuse was the true Beast of the Big East, and one of the top programs of the last 20 years in college basketball, and not UConn?

DRM: Yep. But not any more.

UB: Good man. Thanks for your time.

DRM: My pleasure. Go Huskies! If Syracuse can somehow win tomorrow, I'll go back and change it. You'll never know a thing.

Thanks, Professor!